A Short Guide to Gentler Time Management

Because the to-do list will never be finished.

There’s a quote from Oliver Burkeman’s book 4000 Weeks that’s stuck with me:

“The day will never arrive when you finally have everything under control - when the flood of emails has been contained; when your to-do lists have stopped getting longer… and when the fully optimised person you’ve become can turn, at long last, to the things life is really supposed to be about.”

Like many of us, I’ve spent years trying to ‘get on top of things’ as though there’s a mythical place where everything is done, inboxes are at zero, and the horizon is calm.

But the truth is that place doesn’t exist. And waiting until we get there before making space for the things that matter - rest, connection, creativity, joy - means we might never get to them at all. So what’s the alternative?

Here are some approaches to a gentler version of time management that can help you optimise not for productivity, but for balance.

Shift from control to clarity

We can’t control time, but we can get clearer on what we want to spend it on. A gentler approach to time starts with asking, “What matters most this week? Instead of juggling 27 priorities, pick between one and three that will truly move the needle in either your business or your wellbeing.

Use your to-do list as a guide, not a guilt trip

To-do lists are helpful tools, but they’re not contracts. They’re not proof of your worth, and they’re not meant to be finished. Let them support you, not shame you. It’s okay if things roll over.

Make peace with the undone

There will always be more to do. Always. The work is to make peace with what’s left undone so you can focus on what you’ve chosen to do. Practice finishing your day with the phrase: “This was enough.”

Build in breathing space

Not every moment needs to be filled. Leave space between meetings. Take an actual lunch break. Go for a walk without your phone. Rest isn’t wasted time it’s essential maintenance.

Plan in terms of energy, not just time

Got an hour? Great. But how much energy do you have? Some tasks need peak focus. Others are better saved for lower energy moments. A gentle approach to time management honours both

In summary, gentle time management isn’t about giving up or slacking off. It’s about making conscious choices with your finite time. It’s about creating space for the things that nourish you not just the things that demand your attention.

If you’re feeling overwhelmed by your to-do list, it’s not because you’re failing. It’s because you’re human. And you’re allowed to work in a way that’s sustainable, meaningful, and kind.

Need help carving out space in your day?

Download my One Minute Admin guide for 10 tiny, low-effort admin wins that help you clear clutter and reclaim your focus.

Or book a free Discovery Call to chat about how I can help lighten your admin load so you can focus on the work that really matters.